Unbelievable
Lad of about 14 calls at the house last night, gaggle of his mates standing round the gate smoking.
Very politely he says
"excuse me sorry to bother you, me and my mates are going round washing cars for whatever price you want, we have all the stuff and everything." My immediate reaction was no chance.
Then he says "We are raising money for...(my heart softened, and I began to wonder what cause had merited this effort from the crowd of gluebags) Funderland.
Word must have got round that I was a soft touch. Two kids called on Saturday night asking for sponsorship for a local football club's sponsored walk.They handed me a tatty flyer with three names on it all written in the same handwriting and same pen, the first name was Pop, the second Dazza and the third Glen (no surnames). The scam was so blatantly obvious I wanted to ask them if they were having a laugh, but because I recognised the kid as being from a rather well connected family I gave him a quid.
I really must get more assertive.
Comments
Andy, I'm doing a sponsored... ummm... walk to aauum... the shops tonight and wondered if you would be so kind as to enumerate me financially for this here charity adventure. Furthermore to this walk I would like to wash your car for a small fee.
PS You do know who my uncle is, right?
Posted by: Stephen | October 21, 2003 10:50 AM
Aye dead on...away and jump you wee balix.
See getting more assertive already.
Posted by: Andy | October 21, 2003 04:13 PM
Special offer personal and confidential for you, Mr. Andy!
I am daughter of deposed benevolent King Mogutota of Ligeria and I will *give* you fifteen million dollars if you let me wash your car. All you must supply is your bank account number. See, easy for you! You are to be rich!
Posted by: Princess Shaniqua Mogutota | October 23, 2003 10:03 PM
Account Number 6549087612
Sort Code: 2389
Please don't tell anyone else that you have it though. I look forward to making contact.
Thanks
Posted by: jaffs | October 23, 2003 10:20 PM
You are most wise in your acceptance of this offer! I am to contact our central bank in Lagos to make arrangement for your benefit.
Do you want also a wax for your car?
Posted by: Princess Shaniqua Mogutota | October 23, 2003 11:28 PM
I'll leave the details to you, just do the work and take whatever it costs. Do you need some money up front for cleaning materials? I can send a cheque.
Thanks
Posted by: Andy | October 24, 2003 03:32 PM
Yes and while I am to wiring you the millions you can mail me this "cheque" in the between! Cleaning materials in Ligeria are most unfortunate expensive! I need at least one hundred thousand your British pounds. I like to do the rims of tires very good and this is costing extra.
Posted by: Princess Shaniqua Mogutota | October 24, 2003 04:29 PM