Dick Whittington
" There's gold in them thar hills. No, seriously, there actually is. The Gortin-Plumbridge area of the Sperrin mountains is a bona-fide gold bearing part of this otherwise Emerald Isle, and this has been known for quite some time. The fact that no-one has really bothered doing anything about it is a shining testament to the laziness of the typical Irishman, which is so dedicated to its task that even in the face of insurmountable opportunity it encourages us to favour sitting down at the television and scratching ourselves with the remote control rather than getting up off our backsides and, say, digging up a fortune in nuggets. "